In honor of Clive Owen not winning an Oscar tomorrow, I’ve put together a mini-picspam from his delightful movie Greenfingers.

By the way… Clive Owen + bicycle = OTP!

Hehehe. Hehehehehe.

Controversial Post #621

Extramarital affair is so much fun to say. It just rolls off the tongue like *that*.

Almost makes me want to have one.


…………………………………………. just kidding.

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? Why is Jason Bateman married?


…

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

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I think that Arrested Development may very well be the best TV show ever made. And you’re all not watching it, so its going to get cancelled. That makes me sad.

…

But on the other hand, you’re all watching 24… so kudos! That Jack Bauer plays by his own rules.


I bought season 3 of 24 yesterday. It’s on sale at Target this week. I heart Tony Almeida.

Yeah… I promise a better entry tomorrow when I won’t be working all afternoon and I’ll have some time to think about it.

Today is President’s Day. A time for remembering the great leaders of our country. A time for SHOPPING and SALES! A time for sleeping in. But what about famous almost-Presidents? Yes, it’s a time to remember them as well.

Alexander Hamilton aka “Hammy Hottie”
Highest position obtained: Secretary of Treasury
Where you know him from: The Federalist Papers, The Electoral Collage, your $10 bill
Why no President? A technicality! Really! He was born in the British Isles, so he was Constitutionally unelectable. He was also one of the most elitist individuals ever to walk the planet. And that damn duel with Aaron “mother f-in’” Burr.

Henry Clay aka “Clay-dough”
Highest position obtained: Secretary of State
Where you know him from: All those damn compromises. Also from running for the Presidency 3 times without winning. He was also Speaker of the House and held some other non-descript but prominent government positions… blah, blah, bliggedy, blah.
Why no President? Missouri Compromise, Compromise of 1850… They didn’t name him “The Great Compromiser” for nothing– Clay was a pushover.

John C. Calhoun aka “Motha efin’ Nullifier”
Highest position obtained: Vice President
Where you know him from: Nullification. Yeah, that worked out *real* well. Also of note- South Carolina Exposition, Compromise of 1850, marriage to a girl named Flouride (WTF?)
Why no President? Ummm… the freaky older pictures of him pretty much do the trick. Also, treason might have played a factor.

William Jennings Bryan aka “Supa Silva”
Highest position obtained: Secretary of State
Where you know him from: Free Silver. Running for president way too many times. The Scopes Monkey Trial (Tennessee! Whah-what!)
Why no President? Doesn’t know when to quit when he’s ahead. Also, he had an overabundance of “causes” probably put him out of the running. His name may also have played a factor. President Jennings Bryan is quite a mouthful.

Dick Cheney aka “P.I.M.P.”
Highest position obtained: Vice President
Where you know him from: ordering George W. around, recurring health problems, all-around badass-ness
Why no President? Don’t be so quick to judge! I believe the.Cheney will come through. Sure, he could probably drop dead a week into his administration, but we’ll still get to see his dance moves at the inaugural ball, and that’s worth voting for!

So, yes, it’s finally time for a real layout. I’ll admit it. I have a crush on Jason Bateman. There you go! You’ve got it out of me.

I’m actually pretty proud of myself. This is the first layout in a long time that I put genuine effort into. I also think it’s very reminiscent of the stuff I used to do about a year and a half ago. It took me forever to cut out this picture of him from the original. Oh, and I’d like to thank Bateman Fan for the scans!

And I’ve been trying to get back into regular, daily website\blog visits… so if you have a decent blog with no splash page or frames, please comment with the address or email me the address… I’d really like to find some nice, new websites to visit.

And please, please, please comment if you like the layout.

And so this post won’t be completely humor-free:

Reason #1004782 why my parents are completely UNcool

Me: Did you have a good time at Mulligans?
Dad: No, we went to Christie’s Cabaret.
Me: What? You did not.
Dad: Yeah, we wanted to see where Kid Rock got arrested.

Please, someone help them.